Baby BoK ChoI

Yes, our family doctor is now on her own – coming from another country – and practicing here in the West must be some different for her – but she did go thru’ the usual attachment with a well-known doctor here for about a year and now – she has moved into her own clinic.  I don’t know if they have malpractice insurance here in Canada but new york medical malpractice insurance  is highly recommended for doctors in USA.  And while I don’t really understand why they need malpractice insurance before – I now understand it much better.  Why?  because my MIL is currently in the hospital with an enlarge liver – this morning – we had called her in the hospital and she had said that some of her test results are out but inconclusive because now the doctor is saying that the cancer may be coming from her uterus.  From I don’t know where the cancer is coming from – to searching for the primary source of the cancer – it has been 10 days now – since she was first admitted.

We are of course at this time a little frustrated and very worried and am wondering if the doctor is right or wrong but more tests is called for – now my MIL has to see a liver specialist as well as a gynecologist. I guess so many other specialist are asked to come in and give their opinion because my mother-in-law’s family doctor must want to be on the safe side and not get sued for diagnosing wrongly – plus it almost seems like he doesn’t really want to talk to the family but his patient – why?  maybe he doesn’t want to answer so many questions of ours?  So yes, I understand the malpractice insurance now.

Friends at Chloe’s school asked me all the time about getting a computer for their kids and they ask for recommendations since they know that we deal with computer repairs at our store.  And you know how I am with money – so I tell them that getting a used pc  would be the best bet for their money since their kids are young.  And there is nothing wrong getting a used PC from a reputable place and one that carries a warranty on it as used PCs are just as good as new ones.  So if you are buying a PC for your kids are even a notebook, a lightly used one – is the way to go, no need to go crazy and spend thousands of dollars just for a kid’s PC when you know you only need the very basic.

So we haven’t really grasped what is going on with Chloe’s grammie health yet.  We spoke to her doctor after she had her scan and it’s not good news.  Her liver is enlarged and they suspect that she has cancer and not only in one spot.  I’ve asked her doctor if we had anything to worry about – and if it was treatable but he wasn’t sure it was just one spot – like in its late stages – from what I understand.  So we are currently all in shocked and don’t know what to think or do.

But after a night of restless sleep, I’ve decided that I’ve to be strong for PB and his family – and have to think positive and make sure I send positive thinking to them to.  More tests is asked for now and we are just waiting for a biopsy and another more thorough CT scan.  Hopefully, after that we will get to know more.  In the meantime, we are just praying hard that Chloe’s grammie will fight this, coz’ I don’t know how it would affect Chloe if anything is to happen.  Chloe’s grammie is only 64 and I know we weren’t expecting this at all.

I do not like hospitals – period and only go to one unless absolutely necessary or if it is because Chloe needs to see a doctor.  Now that would be a totally different thing altogether – afterall, it is Chloe we are talking about right.  Today, Chloe’s grammie went into the hospital to see her family doctor but ended up getting admitted to the hospital for a CT scan.  Her doctor had suggested that she stay in the hospital so that she can get her CT scan quicker.   So I got PB to go help her to get admitted and before going home from work we brought Chloe to visit her.  There wasn’t any bed for her – so she was admitted to overflow – where the emergency was, on the ground floor – so we’ll see what happens after she gets her CT scan – hopefully tomorrow.

One good thing about migrating and living in the West is the land you are able to buy and the open space and fresh air that your kid can enjoy and grow up with.  Unlike in Asia, I don’t think I would have the opportunity to send Chloe for horse riding lessons or even owning a horse.   So when people back home say that it’s a land of opportunity in the West – I’m guessing this is what they mean.  A few months ago, we had the opportunity to send Chloe for horse riding classes and armed with english horse tack  and equestrian clothing and boots – Chloe had fallen in love with a pony and times when we don’t have riding classes, we still drive up to Shelburne to see her favorite pony.

We are currently looking at buying a pony for Chloe and of course we are very excited to be first time horse owners but on the other hand – do we have enough time to look after the pony?  But we were told that we can buy the pony and leave it at the ranch to be kept there and looked after by trained staff from the ranch.  The pony is about 700 Ibs and born in 2006 and is currently on sale for $1800 – not a bad price if you asked me.   Anyhow, we will update you all more if we win the bid for the pony.

I have to constantly remind myself that there is cultural difference between PB’s upbringing and our Chinese upbringing and our values.  Today is Tuesday and Grammie didn’t come to the store like she would – probably because she didn’t have a ride to town.  And since Chloe didn’t go to Grammie’s on Sunday because of a birthday party and didn’t go the week before because Grammie was busy – that means she didn’t really get to spend any quality time with her grandparents.

In our chinese culture, it’s important to let the grandchildren visit their grandparents and let the kids bond with their grandparents.  To me when I had Chloe – I had this beautiful dream of Chloe growing up with loving grandparents and spending lots of time with them – shopping, going around town and doing stuff together.  But alas, that did not happened – for the first 6 – 7 yrs of Chloe’s life – she wouldn’t visit her grandparents without us around.   Now that she would – her grandparents are very busy themselves – because they have to work and they do have a life of their own too.

Of course, I understand that and had come to terms with the fact that Western grandparents do not expect what the Eastern grandparents would want and expect us to do.  But it’s Chloe who doesn’t understand why her Grammie didn’t come visit and even though we explained to her many times – she still feel sad everytime she doesn’t visit for a few hours – or when she doesn’t get to visit her grandparents. I’ve  brought Chloe up to be a very loving child – if you’ve met her personally, you would know that she is friendly and loving to just about anyone.   She can give a tour of the house to her father’s friend – without the other person asking, so I figured she must feel sad whenever her grammie doesn’t visit when she is supposed to.  *sigh*.

When I was a kid – I wanted to learn music so much – that I would ask my friends who knows how to play the piano in church to teach me a song or two.  I also picked up the acoustic guitar  on my own – when I was a teenager and singing in the church choir.  So with Chloe I too wanted her to learn how to play the piano or the violin and take up ballet classes or swimming – well, you get the hint – stuff that I never got to do and wanted for my child.

Unfortunately, as musically inclined as Chloe is – she is not very interested in a lot of things.  She took a term of ballet and decided that she didn’t like it, she took a term of highland dancing and decided that she didn’t like it either because it was too monotonous. As for ballet classes and hip hop the same thing and swimming – she took one term of it and decided that she was too afraid to go to the deeper end. It’s hard to find a piano teacher around town – the one we found was out of town and even though it wasn’t a lot of money – to send her to class, we want to make sure she would not take it for a term and decides to stop like other things.

The longest thus far is her Karate classes – she is into her 3rd term now into Karate and now has decided to go back into ballet and wants to learn acoustic guitar and also the piano.   So this year, besides ballet, piano and karate classes, we are adding on acoustic guitar – we found her a nice music teacher who sings and plays the guitar – I think she might just like it and I’ve warned her – if she quit after one term, she will have half her toys taken to salvation army.   I’m not letting my kid be a quitter no more – some Tiger Mom must come out – thanks to Amy Chua – I’m no longer afraid to push Chloe to the max.  Oh did I tell you – she take drawing classes too this year.

While PB doesn’t like to plan for anything and just go with the flow – I’m the planner, I need everything to be laid out and then I execute it.  I don’t know if you called it meticulous or a bit of OCD in me acting up.  But whether it’s the power bills, internet bills, credit card bills or   our life insurance, car insurance  and rv insurance  – everything is noted in my planner – and I will check it a few times day.

I also plan Chloe’s meals ahead of time – and never let her eat the same thing for dinner and lunch, there is always a variety of food for her to try and I keep them as healthy as possible.  Yes! it irks me so much when PB is late on a bill – not because we cannot afford it but he forgets and don’t like to be reminded constantly.  I really think that my obsession to pay and do everything as planned comes from the fact that I come from a poor family and everything seems to be on dateline – we never had money to spare when I was a kid – but I know that my mom paid for everything on time and never ever borrowed from anyone.  We just don’t have any toys or any new clothes or shoes but that’s alright.  Now that I’m with my own family, I can appreciate my mom and what she does with money – therefore, I never let PB or Chloe spend money that we don’t have and bills has to be paid on time – yes, even the rv insurance.