Singapore, The Plight of an Impoverished Nation

So I went for a haircut with a new hair stylist because the one I go to .. is too busy to return my call. Yes.. i had been trying to get ahold of her.. but nope.. no luck for more than a month. So finally, I got myself an appt with another hairstylist in town. She did a great job .. and i really like her. But was amused and amazed … when she asked me.. if everyone in Singapore was poor. I donch know how i should have reacted..?? But that probably explains why when i first came to Canada, the employees we had said stuff like ” I was rescued from poverty” muahahhahaha!!!! I guess they really must think we lived in attap houses. For those who are not aware of this.. the place I am living in .. is prolly like the 80s in Singapore. We have no high rise here.. like in Asia. The tallest building here is 5 – storey tall – of course in the city about 4 hrs they have taller ones.. but not as tall as the ones back home.

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Is it ignorance..?? or what..?? am i offended..?? nah.. but quite amused lor .. truth be told.. that the ppl in Canada.. donch know where Singapore is.. nor know that we are the 5th richest country in the world.. and our government has a $170.3billion in reserve. Singapore is highly cosmopolitan and diverse with Chinese people forming an ethnic majority with large populations of Malay, Indian and other people. Well, there you have it.. so if anyone ask me.. i’ll show them this post.. muahahahhaha!!! very amusing eh – Canadians we are talking about here.

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In Love With A Foreigner

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For those who are not aware of this, I was approached by immigration lawyers about a year ago to share my experiences with others like myself who had fallen in love with someone other than your own country or those thinking of migrating to Canada. Am I compensated for it..?? nope.. but i feel good helping others out.. and if you know me .. you would know that I’m that kind of person. But for those “idiots” out there.. i have no patients with them nor do I want to associate myself with them. My philosophy in life is .. why bother or waste time on non-important stuff and “A-holes”.

Ok.. lets get back to the immigration stuff. Most ppl asked me .. how I made the decision .. and what made me decide to uproot – afterall, we all know that Singapore is a place with everything and anything. Is love really blind..?? Is love enough to sustain a long lasting relationship…??? Migrating is no laughing matter, nor was it an easy decision to stay and not go back home, like buying some toy.  I have been in Canada.. for almost 10 yrs now .. and before coming to Canada.. I was in a 6 yrs long distance relationship with my spouse.

I cannot speak for other men in Canada.. but my spouse is a pretty simple and straightforward person.. who doesn’t believe in even telling white lies. Having said that.. it’s not like he fights with me .. all the time.. just to get his point across but he rather .. not fight.. and let me go on a rant.. every now and then.. if i so wish to. As the years went by .. it gets a little harder.. because i do miss home.. and i do miss the food from home. But had i not come.. i wouldn’t have such a beautiful daughter.. who is my greatest accomplishment.

So do you listen to your heart or your head..??? I have no regrets .. and if i had to turn the clock back.. i would rather had him come to Singapore.. but love is a strange thing eh..?? so if you are thinking of migrating.. you will have to weigh your pros and cons.. but make sure that whatever you do, you have to be very sure.. the person you are gonna be with .. is not psycho or a serial killer.. or a woman beater.. or will mentally torture you. Harsh as i may sound, it is for your own safety.

Help For Sore Losers

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As Chloe grows older day by day, we also learn different things as parents. But like all new parents – we consider ourselves new .. because she is our only child .. and we never had the experience nor expertise .. in bringing up another kid.. nor were educated for it – it is amazing how much we learn from this child of ours.. and how much we want to better ourselves to teach her the best and the right thing.

As awesome as any kid can be.. i’m sure – parents do not want to admit that their kid can turn into a brat just overnite.. and our chloe can be.. if she wants to be. But like any kid who is 5.5yrs old, one need to realise.. that it is all a learning experience for her too. A child do not know how to express themselves appropriately, they only know how to show how they are feeling truthfully albeit it may not be the best way or the correct way. That’s why God created parents donch you think..??

Being the only child can sometimes be hard because she is so protected – hell we even send her to day camp with her babysitter. So if she was a sore loser, that can be understandable.. but that does not mean that it should carry on. So when Chloe only wanted to win in everything whether a game with the sitter or a game with a friend who was visiting, we told her that she cannot be a sore loser. In which her respond was .. ” WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA …!!!! Jenny said i was a sore loser too..!!!”

Alrighty..!!! so we know we had to steer my kid into the right direction and the right response from us is very important at this stage. I bet many of you know where i’m coming from eh and in fact asked yourselves .. what demon actually possessed your kid .. at that moment.. right..?? hahhahahaha!!! fear not..!! for experts said it is normal behavior for a child as young as ours.

So what do you do..?? you asked yourself..?? when you child have an outburst or blow up..?? steer clear your clear of competitive situation..?? or give your child a treat.. and distract them..?? Banning games or distracting them or not encouraging competition are all not good ideas – our job as parents is to teach them to express respectfully and the younger you start, the better it is. It is recommended that you empathise and ask if they need an alone time to cry and to cool off, talk to them about a more appropriate way to express themselves. Allowing both kids to win by yelling “Tie!” is also another alternative and explaining to your kid that both can win even if they come in second and their friend first. All the positive re-enforcement .. eh..?? Focus on pointing out the good stuff, like “that was a nice move!” or “good try!” and always make sure that you tell your kid .. having a good time and good sportmanship is more important than winning .. and by the time they are older.. they will know that winning feels good.. but even if you donch win, it’s alright..! they had fun.. and that’s what matters most. I hope my experience help others…. therefore i’m penning it down. Good luck..!!! and no… your kid is not evil..! hahhahahaha!!!

Helen

I received this message on my expat blog profile, but helen, i’m unable to reply because you have not email address. You can write to me.. on my contact on this blog, else you can leave a comment here. Migrating is a huge thing, I’ve been thru’ it. .and I want to help as much as possible. I’m no expert.. but can only share my experiences with others. For those who are thinking of migrating.. feel free to ask me any questions. So Helen .. contact me.. because you need to.. ! I usually do not post your questions here.. but since you are 3 months pregnant.. it’s important.. that we speak quickly.

Hi, I am a Singaporean, applying for Canada immigration now. Just got the medical exam done. I am currently 3 months pregnant. Can you advise me on whether go Canada and deliver, or deliver in Singapore then go Canada? What are the charges if I deliver in Canada? Thanks.
by Helen on 01/07/2009 at 21:10:42