Category: The Other Half

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Teaching My Kids About Wants & Needs

We always try not to buy expensive and unreasonable gifts for Chloe and we also trained her not to see something and wants it immediately from young.  The toys you see here – are not toys that Chloe had asked for – nor are they new – we bought them from a local yardsale – for less than $65 altogether.  And we also want to state that we didn’t buy everything for her at once – they all came in pieces and at the time when they are at the right prices.

Chloe had been taught that money is hard to earn and even though she doesn’t know the value of money – she never really ask for a lot of toys.  We usually buy her toys from the dollar store and even then – we make it look like it’s a lot to ask.  She n ever ask more than 2 toys from the dollar store.

Because she is so good – we buy stuff for her without her asking for it when we see them on sale at the local yard sale – she would be surprised and very grateful with whatever we buy for her.  So yes! we taught our kid – her wants and needs and to differentiate it

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Saving Money At Home & Work

We try to save money in any way we can – from buying things that is on sale – and stock up when there is a good sale on but of course, we also make sure that we don’t buy or spend just because something is cheap.  Owning your own business as well as raising a kid means only one thing – spending your money wisely – so if there is a rebate to get we get it.  Now the only thing that is  killing us is our power bills.  There is no low cost energy  here in our town – and when it comes to winter – it does suxs big time.  I wished we can lower our electric bills – our entire house is electric heat – so we are quite dependent on it.

So this is what we did at home to save money, to save power bills – we had a french door put in our tv room – so that we won’t have to heat the entire kitchen and tv room when we wanted one or the other heated. We also only heat up the rooms that we are using – and at work we brought 2 infra-red heated to save on our power bills.  We thought about putting in a wood stove at home but that would means we need to fork out money to put in a new chimney and of course buy the wood stove and rewire the home a little.  At work, we will heat up the store for a few hours and then turn it down for the rest of the day – using only the infrared machine.  If we are still cold, we have small little heaters turned up for a bit to warm us up.  So there – you have it – on how we save money at home and work with our power bills.  If only we had this low cost energy saving program they have in certain part of the USA – I would definitely bee the first to jump on it.

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Hacking My Lungs Out !

Darn ! I lost my voice and currently am hacking my lungs out!  I bet I caught the cold from PB – who had been hacking his for a few days now causing me no sleep.  But I can’t complained else he will feel bad about it.  So now revenge time for me tonite and the next few nites – hahahha!

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Spring Cannot Come Sooner

It had been a really trying month for us – the entire family – i can’t wait for the warmer weather to come – and for us to get out of this deary mode.  With what had happened recently in our family – I’ll say we need a lot of warmth and sunshine.  This year I think I might just be responsible taking care of the boys at home since now that the mother-in-law is gone.  I saw some carhartt shorts  and thought of the spouse, the brother-in-law and the father-in-law and wonder to myself if i should buy it for them.   Before when the mother-in-law is around I didn’t worry about any of the boys because after all, she is the mother and I’m not and I had it good then.  She would do everything for them – from knitting socks to buying their underwear. Now I’m going to have to look out for the rest of the boys because I know that’s what my mother-in-law would want.  So when I shop for the spouse now – I would think of the father-in-law as well as the brother-in-law.

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The Funeral

Yes!  the day has come to say our final goodbyes to Grammie – a very sad day for all of us.  We rushed to get some funeral clothes for PB and myself – and for Chloe – we already have something for her to wear.  The funeral home was filled with people and Grammie looked as good as it gets.  Chloe was afraid to see her grammie at first but after a while she went to say her final goodbyes.  When they closed the casket I was so filled with sadness and I couldn’t helped myself and sob like a baby.  It was just all too sad for me.  Sad for Chloe and sad for my father-in-law who lost his constant companion of 45 years.

It was sad for me because of all the things Chloe would missed out on now that Grammie is gone.  And even though I lament all the time tht Grammie did not spend enough time with Chloe – now it is more real that there is no time at all for Chloe with her Grammie.  I was counting on Grammie to help me raise Chloe but all that hope is gone.

I lost my own Grandmother when I was 9 yrs old but I don’t quite remember her because she didn’t love me as much as Chloe’s Grammie did for Grammie.  They would hugged, they would kissed, they would cooked together and baked together and dig dirt together or go into the gardens together and pick peas but everything is gone now – no more special time with her Grammie.  No one can replaced what her Grammie do with Chloe – it’s just all too sad for us.

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Hanging Onto Grammie

Yes, chloe is desperately hanging on to Grammie and hoping that she will get well – but at this point of time we knew it wasn’t going to happen.  But Chloe drew and drew and drew and drew fairies and put on good wishes for her grammie.  My heart breaks for my daughter and wished for a miracle.  I even asked God to heal Grammie – and I’ll give up all my Chinese food.  But Grammie is getting worst by the day – she isn’t even talking to us no more.  We are currently preparing Chloe for her Grammie’s passing, she doesn’t like it and who does and she still asking for pixie dust to be sprinkled on Grammie – so that Grammie can get well soon.

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Chloe Dealing With Grammie Who Is Sick

When Grammie got sick – I had asked Chloe how she feels about Grammie being sick and in the hospital – being the new age mom – I learned that we have to talk to our kids about things they don’t comprehend and don’t know how to go about asking about it.  We bring Chloe to visit her grammie everyday since she was admitted to the hospital and she make it her plan to read to her grammie in the hospital – I thought that was a very good idea – and she enjoys showing off her reading skill.

So how is Chloe coping with her grammie’s illness?  first of all she doesn’t know that Grammie is very sick – we told her that Grammie is in the hospital to do more tests and to find out what is wrong.  Chloe said she is a little sad and hopes that Grammie discharge soon because she doesn’t like visiting Grammie in the hospital.  She asked me one night – if Grammie was going to be alright – and I had told her that yes, Grammie is going to get treated and she will be as good as new or somewhat new.

Chloe is very closed to her Grammie – more than her grampie – so if anything happens to her Grammie, I think she will be scared forever.  So I’m really praying hard that Grammie will be treatable and that she will lived a long, long time. As for now, we are telling Chloe to have hope and to pray.

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Not Good News On Grammie

So we haven’t really grasped what is going on with Chloe’s grammie health yet.  We spoke to her doctor after she had her scan and it’s not good news.  Her liver is enlarged and they suspect that she has cancer and not only in one spot.  I’ve asked her doctor if we had anything to worry about – and if it was treatable but he wasn’t sure it was just one spot – like in its late stages – from what I understand.  So we are currently all in shocked and don’t know what to think or do.

But after a night of restless sleep, I’ve decided that I’ve to be strong for PB and his family – and have to think positive and make sure I send positive thinking to them to.  More tests is asked for now and we are just waiting for a biopsy and another more thorough CT scan.  Hopefully, after that we will get to know more.  In the meantime, we are just praying hard that Chloe’s grammie will fight this, coz’ I don’t know how it would affect Chloe if anything is to happen.  Chloe’s grammie is only 64 and I know we weren’t expecting this at all.

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Hospitals

I do not like hospitals – period and only go to one unless absolutely necessary or if it is because Chloe needs to see a doctor.  Now that would be a totally different thing altogether – afterall, it is Chloe we are talking about right.  Today, Chloe’s grammie went into the hospital to see her family doctor but ended up getting admitted to the hospital for a CT scan.  Her doctor had suggested that she stay in the hospital so that she can get her CT scan quicker.   So I got PB to go help her to get admitted and before going home from work we brought Chloe to visit her.  There wasn’t any bed for her – so she was admitted to overflow – where the emergency was, on the ground floor – so we’ll see what happens after she gets her CT scan – hopefully tomorrow.

 

 

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East Meets West Upbringing Of A Child

I have to constantly remind myself that there is cultural difference between PB’s upbringing and our Chinese upbringing and our values.  Today is Tuesday and Grammie didn’t come to the store like she would – probably because she didn’t have a ride to town.  And since Chloe didn’t go to Grammie’s on Sunday because of a birthday party and didn’t go the week before because Grammie was busy – that means she didn’t really get to spend any quality time with her grandparents.

In our chinese culture, it’s important to let the grandchildren visit their grandparents and let the kids bond with their grandparents.  To me when I had Chloe – I had this beautiful dream of Chloe growing up with loving grandparents and spending lots of time with them – shopping, going around town and doing stuff together.  But alas, that did not happened – for the first 6 – 7 yrs of Chloe’s life – she wouldn’t visit her grandparents without us around.   Now that she would – her grandparents are very busy themselves – because they have to work and they do have a life of their own too.

Of course, I understand that and had come to terms with the fact that Western grandparents do not expect what the Eastern grandparents would want and expect us to do.  But it’s Chloe who doesn’t understand why her Grammie didn’t come visit and even though we explained to her many times – she still feel sad everytime she doesn’t visit for a few hours – or when she doesn’t get to visit her grandparents. I’ve  brought Chloe up to be a very loving child – if you’ve met her personally, you would know that she is friendly and loving to just about anyone.   She can give a tour of the house to her father’s friend – without the other person asking, so I figured she must feel sad whenever her grammie doesn’t visit when she is supposed to.  *sigh*.