Teaching My Kid About Friendship

Chloe just finished her summer day camp on Friday and we spent a little time together for the entire day on Friday – I asked her about summer camp if she had fun – and if she had gotten herself some good friends – in which she replied that she did have some good friends – but some kids were mean and nasty. And some only wanted candies from her – before they would let her play. So I thought about it – and tried to think what it was like when I was a kid and how I handled being friends with people back then.

Was I a popular kid when I was young ? I was – in fact – I’m like the red indian – when I grew older – I’m always at the center of attention – because I speak the loudest and played the hardest – I wanted to excel in everything and anything. I remembered one year in my secondary school days – I was the best speaker for the LDDs debate team. I headed the team – and I was the school editor for a school paper one year. But i also realized that after my secondary school I didn’t come ahead with too many “best friends” because I didn’t really cared too much about what other people thought about me – I like to do things the way I liked.

But of course, as I grew older and at 46 now – I also have no time for nonsense when it comes to friendship. It takes a long time for me to call you my friend – you have to earn it – and to me – no one is indispensable – friends come and go – but the true friends – you don’t need a lot. True friendship don’t need flattery words – a good friend is one who will tell you the truth and look out for you. So I told Chloe not to sweat the small stuff – good friends are those – you can lean on always – and yes – I want her to be good to her friends – be sympathetic, be kind and be gracious – but never be a doormat to anyone. And most importantly, one have to love oneself first before you can have true friends.