Category: Family/From the Heart

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Teaching My Kid About Friendship

Chloe just finished her summer day camp on Friday and we spent a little time together for the entire day on Friday – I asked her about summer camp if she had fun – and if she had gotten herself some good friends – in which she replied that she did have some good friends – but some kids were mean and nasty. And some only wanted candies from her – before they would let her play. So I thought about it – and tried to think what it was like when I was a kid and how I handled being friends with people back then.

Was I a popular kid when I was young ? I was – in fact – I’m like the red indian – when I grew older – I’m always at the center of attention – because I speak the loudest and played the hardest – I wanted to excel in everything and anything. I remembered one year in my secondary school days – I was the best speaker for the LDDs debate team. I headed the team – and I was the school editor for a school paper one year. But i also realized that after my secondary school I didn’t come ahead with too many “best friends” because I didn’t really cared too much about what other people thought about me – I like to do things the way I liked.

But of course, as I grew older and at 46 now – I also have no time for nonsense when it comes to friendship. It takes a long time for me to call you my friend – you have to earn it – and to me – no one is indispensable – friends come and go – but the true friends – you don’t need a lot. True friendship don’t need flattery words – a good friend is one who will tell you the truth and look out for you. So I told Chloe not to sweat the small stuff – good friends are those – you can lean on always – and yes – I want her to be good to her friends – be sympathetic, be kind and be gracious – but never be a doormat to anyone. And most importantly, one have to love oneself first before you can have true friends.

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Celebrating Grandparents’ Day

This weekend is Grandparents’ Day – although some may argue that it’s a way commercial business make you buy more gifts and spend money – I think it is important to acknowledge Grandparents who played a very important part in your child’s life. After all, Grandparents are the next closest relative besides the parents right? and even though grandparents don’t look for gratitude – I think it’s important to show Grandparents how much we appreciate their help, love and gifts they pour onto your kids. While I had gotten my mom gifts at Shari’s Berries – for grandparents’ day – we are going to order some cheese and flowers. So for those who are not aware that Grandparents’ day is this weekend – you still have time to order your gifts now – it doesn’t need to be a whole bunch of gifts – just chocolates, cheese or flowers are very nice gestures to show you appreciate them.

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Summer Ends

Chloe will be going back into school in a few days – and that means the summer holiday is ending for her soon. Unfortunately, PB hasn’t planned anything at all the entire summer *sigh*. Why am I not surprised? I realised today there are 2 things I cannot depend on during summer – #1 – is for PB to plan for us a holiday or a good time and #2 – my plans for Chloe to bond with her grandparents during the summer – these 2 things never seems to work at all. Am I upset ? A little. Am I disappointed? Very! The cold weather will be setting in really soon – and to go anywhere – would just means you have to keep that sweater on – and sometimes be in the rain. So even if we do go to the city in September or October – I wouldn’t enjoy it as much as during the summer. And again this summer – no Clement’s park or the zoo *sigh*. Oh well! what can I do right? wait till i burst and go crazy I guess. Tis’ my life!

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Studying In Canada

So someone wrote to me the other day – about sending her kids to Canada to finish their studies – and wants my opinion about it. In which my reply was – that if they do send their kids here – they will fair a lot better than most Canadian kids because foreign kids are much more competitive than our Canadian students. The teachers in Canada loved exchange students and they in turn learned about other cultures and also the different weather – if they come from Malaysia, Singapore of even Indonesia. Here in this town, we see lots of foreign students but sad to say – they are not as exposed as they should be.

So before sending your kids here – make sure you get them to the right school – the right area – a lot of kids do not like to be in small town – and they have no choice – after coming here – because they have nothing to do once school is over. If you are seriously thinking of sending your kids here to finish their high school – check out both Halifax area – as well as Vancouver – I know you have to pay a little more – but I think your kids will be more accustomed to that area instead of places like a small town. If you can – try to make sure that you go and visit the place before sending your kids here with just a brochure – brochures are meant to lie.

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Getting Married In Canada

So you found a Canadian boyfriend and he gave you the ring – and proposed – so you want to get married in Canada? or should you get married in your home country and then do it all over again in Canada? Or is it legal to get married in your home country and not bother when you come back to Canada – since you are thinking of moving to Canada with him some time right? Well, of course, if he decided to move to your home country – now that would be a different story and of course you wouldn’t be reading this right?

Well, whatever you decide – you will have to think of what you are going to do first – for immigration purpose. Getting married in your hometown – doesn’t automatically make you a Canadian resident or a Canadian citizen as far as I know – in fact – getting married away from Canada – may post a little more complicated than you think when trying to migrate to Canada. From my experience – I strongly suggest – you come to Canada first as a tourist – apply for a marriage license here – get married here and then do your immigration from here – while you have a tourist status. Usually, Canadian immigration will grant you a 6 months visitor pass – and that is enough to get your application going. But my experience is only my own – my 2 cents – so don’t hold it against me – if yours work out differently. Good luck!

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Boating Safety Tips for Kids

As adults boaters, we learn a great deal about safety on the way to earning our boat license. What we often don’t learn, however, is how to share these skills with our children. This can be tricky business because kids tend not to learn well when they’re disinterested and when we overload them. The key then is to seize their attention and to expose them to the information in bite-sized chunks.

Image Source: http://www.worldfishingnetwork.com/news/last-call-for-kids-safety-program-72624.aspx

Here are a series of tips that should help:

Tip #1: Teach the kids to swim, and make sure they have ocean experience. Swimming in the ocean is a very different experience, and those with pool-only practice may freeze up in an emergency.

Tip #2: Once the children know how to swim, introduce them to personal flotation devices (PFDs), and explain to them why a PFD is so important. Stress the importance of wearing a PFD at all times, and give them experience wearing the PFD in and out of the water before their first boat trip.

Tip #3: Don’t wait until the first time on the water. Acclimate kids to your boat while you have it on the trailer parked at your house. Make a game out of understanding the terminology, safety locations, danger zones and so forth.

Tip #4: Ensure that they understand the risk of horseplay while on the water, and a great way to avoid this type of behaviour is to give children seated responsibilities while you are driving. If they are having fun and feel as if they are doing something important, they will continue to focus on that activity.

Tip #5: Stress the importance of sitting at all times while the boat is in motion. Standing is only OK when the boat is stopped, and stress that it is never all right to sit or stand on the sides of the boat.

Tip #6: Expose children to all of the equipment on board, and let them learn how to operate it. Begin teaching children how to operate and drive the boat at a very young age. This can prove invaluable in an emergency, and the safest boaters are self-reliant boaters.

Tip #7: However, stress that it is never OK to use that equipment without adult supervision unless there is an emergency. It also important to be strict about your rules, so if the child breaks them, they should lose boating privileges.

Tip #8: While on the boat, always set a good example. Don’t let kids be around adults who don’t take the experience seriously. Keep your eyes on them at all times, and consider using a safety harness for particularly young children who may stray on larger boats.

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Children Using The Puffer

Chloe wasn’t a happy camper when she first had to use the puffer – in fact, she was so scared – she covered her mouth – her nose – and make us count 1 to 10 for like a few times and still she wouldn’t use the puffer. She was crying so bad – that her dad got so mad with her – he threw the puffer away. Yes ! such JOY! I wasn’t too impressed with PB of course – but I didn’t say anything – because Chloe was hyperventilating by that time. Well, she did finally use the puffer that night and got better every day. In fact, she got so good at it – she put the puffer and the aerochamber together now and use it herself – without any help.

She’s an expert now – yes! children can get scared of strange things – but they are but children right? so if your child needs the puffer – please have a little bit of patience – don’t be like PB please – *slap forehead* you should have seen how scared chloe was when PB got mad. Adults gotta know that when we get angry – our children get really scared – some may not act that way – but deep inside they are – every child wants their parents approval. Didn’t you want your parent’s approval too when you were kids?

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No Expensive Presents Please!

So you all know that Chloe was sick for like 10 days right? when she got her needles last Monday – to draw blood out for her blood test – she was screaming her lungs out. I wasn’t there but PB and a dear friend who works for the lab department was there to witness it. But PB had promised Chloe a reward for being brave and letting them draw blood – so they had gone to Walmart and gotten her some go-gos but not just any go-gos – but a box of it – special edition – which cost PB closed to $23 !!!! *slap forehead*.

For those who are not aware of this – I don’t like to get Chloe expensive presents – because she really don’t need expensive toys. Giving her a dollar store reward is just as good – and when we do get her go-gos – they are the ones that are $3 for 3 pieces – not a bunch for $23 !! that’s too much money to be spent on a kid for one day. I don’t want Chloe to learn that it is alright to spend so much money on toys.

Many a times – when I asked Chloe’s grandparents for money for her watch or books isn’t because I don’t have the money to get them myself – but I am trying to show her that some of her things comes from her grandparents and uncle too. But when I tell Chloe to tell her uncle or grandfather that they owe me a few bucks for Chloe’s stuff – it’s to tell her that they are the ones who bought them for her and not us. We also want to show Chloe that they care for her too- and know what she likes since they normally don’t know what she likes and what to buy for her. But I never asked anyone to get anything expensive for Chloe – it’s just a gesture – to teach Chloe that she is being thought of – even by her extended family. Should I asked her grandparents or uncle to get something really expensive – I would return in kind – like the Rum that we had bought for her grampie – because I want to teach Chloe that she cannot take only and never give back. So no – no expensive toys from us – and when PB bought that go-gos for $23 – I wasn’t impressed. And for those who hear me telling Chloe’s grandparents or uncle – that they owe me money for Chloe’s stuff/toys – it’s not because I’m hard up for their money – but moreso – to show Chloe that her gifts comes from her grandparents and uncle too – because her Godma from Singapore and my friends/cousins from around the world buys her so many things – Chloe is no short of anything – be it clothing or toys.

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Spending Money On My Kid

Chloe’s handmade hat from Vancouver got stolen just before school ended – and it was a pretty expensive one of a kind hat. She was devastated and I quickly got her another one – to replace the one that was stolen. Some people might think that I’m crazy to spend so much money on a hat for a kid – but when it comes to spending money on Chloe – I have no qualms at all. Call me anything you want – but if it had anything to do with Chloe – whether it is directly or indirectly – I won’t mind spending money on her. Of course, that doesn’t mean that I am going to go out there and buy her a iPad or a Iphone – you know what I mean right? I try to give her to best in terms of nutrition – and school stuff – things that is compulsory – and yes ! i do splurge on her like her hat – but I figured it’s a good hat and it will be used for a long time provided it’s not stolen by someone.

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Tattoos and Make-Ups

While some parents paint their kid’s nails and color their hair as young as 5 years old – I don’t even encourage chloe to put on fake tattoos like the ones she got from her summer day camp. Why? because some are hard to get off – and it might just cause a rash on her skin. Painting nails are not encouraged too – because I want Chloe to enjoy being a kid as long as possible. She can take her time – to grow up and enjoy all the things I never did – and be carefree – painting nails – putting on lipsticks are just too adult for my liking. I feel that if I let her do all that – she might start growing up before her time is up yet – and will be up to no good even before she turn into a teenager.

I try to teach Chloe it’s not the outside that’s important – it’s what inside that is more important than anything and a girl’s self worth is not by what she look – but by being selfless, honest and good hearted. Kids should not be taught to paint themselves up and look like a wayang actress to be admired. I want to teach Chloe to be sure and confident of herself – by being her.