Category: Family/From the Heart

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Relationships

As I sit and admire my contemporary sofas in my tv room, i cannot helped but also admire the beautiful pictures of a friend – Alexis’s family outing in Vancouver with her beautiful family. You see, Alexis was someone I met thru’ PB’s buddy – they used to date and while they are no longer together -Alexis and I kept in contact. You see Alexis is a very wonderful and lovely looking lady from Singapore and I had took a instant liking for her when i first met her 10 yrs ago. As I look at her happy family – I cannot but feel a tinge of regret for PB’s buddy for not cherishing the relationship and things ended the way it did.

Relationships are hard and I admire the way Alexis ended it – even though they were together for a long time and have a kid together. Alexis is now married and has her own kids with her new husband and he looks like a wonderful person – he is from Sweden. I sometimes wonder if people from the West knows how tough it is for us to uproot just to be with them? do they even know – how much we miss home – the food, the weather, the shopping – everything just to be with them.

Relationships are hard – having a kid together doesn’t mean one must stay with someone who don’t appreciate you. I admire Alexis – for being so strong – even though at that time – she wasn’t with anyone – didn’t have a job and a kid to raise – she call it quits. I don’t know the whole story – but I know relationships are hard and for things to work – both gotta make lots of effort.

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My Kids Don’t Lie

Hahahah!! Surrreeeeeeeee.. sisters! they don’t exactly lie especially when they are very young because in order to lie – they have to know exactly what they are saying is false. They have to understand the difference between a lie and the truth. So they are either fibbing or making up their own fantasy – they think it is a joke (well – to chloe anyways). But as she grew older – we can also see the difference between fibbing and “lying” to get outta trouble and/or protect themselves against unwanted punishment or rebuking.

Just like what happened to the office furniture we were looking at – and it accidentally fell over at the showroom. Chloe insisted it wasn’t her – and that she didn’t touch it and started crying and said she didn’t do nothing. We never even start to scold her or accused her but she immediately thought that she was in trouble. As parents, we have to know why our kid is reacting this way – for Chloe we figured it was because she didn’t wanna look “bad” – or presumed as being a “bad” kid – therefore, she started wailing.

So our actions and body language – expression on our faces – has gotta be careful – don’t think your kid don’t know what he/she is up against because she reads you like a book too. But yes, if you catches your kid lying – explained to them – that a lie is hurtful and asked them how they would feel if someone said that to her? Focus on fixing the problem together and explain why the truth is important. So good luck – everyone ! I’m sure I will be needing it too.

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I Don’t Wanna !

Yes ! Chloe is currently in this mode of late – everything you asked her to do – even if it was just eating something – she replies ” i don’t wanna!” It’s like a bad eczema that don’t want to go away. And then of course, she was ill for more than 10 days – so when she finally got better and became really sassy – i threatened to throw her stuff away. In which – it sent her on a howling session. Yes! Monstermom 101 here – sometimes I too wonder if i am not spending enough time with her. Children needs attention and i do pride myself as giving her as much as I can – for all her life – she is with us – even at work. Even when we got a babysitter for her – the sitter had to be the one to come to us – and be with us at work. So what is triggering all these sassyness?

Last nite – i dropped everything that i was doing and be there for her after she had her supper. I read to her – played with her and noticed a vast difference – maybe it’s because she doesn’t like me working too much – and talking to the customers too much – I guess it’s just a phase – and summer is on its way – school ends in less than a month. Can’t be sending her to her grammie’s everyday eh – so yes – better plan to spend more time with the kid – don’t want her to grow up to be bad.

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Taking A Back Seat With This Town

Many moons ago, I would have gone on a rant when anything happens in this town – but when my Chloe wasn’t taken care of when she was in the other school – when a little boy was bothering her for months – that was when I decided I will take a back seat where this town is concerned. When you lived in this town – you won’t even need apidexin to loss weight – because this town just aggravates the hell outta you. The decisions that the town councils and the MLAs – even the Premier makes just makes no sense to me.

A few weeks ago, the school board announced some changes with the school system – normally i would also pitch in my say by now – but these days – i just take care of my own – and do well for my kid and my family. Why? like i anticipated – no matter how much picketing you might want to go on – or open a Facebook page to protest – guess what – they will still stick to their decisions – like the rest of the town – when they decide on something to their benefit – and won’t be defeated.

The people who runs this town – to me are just doing things to save their faces – they won’t back down because they all have their own agenda – there is no the greater good here. It is for each his own here – so no – from that day after March Spring break – i told myself – to me my own too.

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Stubborn Bug

So Chloe threw up like the Merlion this evening – at about 9pm while eating her snack – more than a week after she first threw up and more than 5 days since she last threw up – it’s back again! Luckily we have a Toto toilet for all her puking session – else there is gonna be a lot of clean up to do. The stomach bug is very stubborn and we thought she was doing so well – cramps still and she does try to throw up when she gets her cramps but nothing came out till tonite. As much as we would like to listen to the doctor and wait it out – do we not want to check if there was something else wrong. Afteall, Chloe hasn’t been this sick all her life – i know she will survived it – but the waiting game is hard on the poor kid – who is already a stick and now not eating much.. and throwing up everything. Darn!

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Keeping Healthy When Your Child Is Sick

So Chloe is still puking today and as much as i wanna do other things and catch up with work and the store or even read about irvingia gabonensis, it would just have to wait. You see, I’m far away from home and friends and don’t have many here – so i can’t get any help – in terms of someone helping out with the housework or with taking over for a few hours to look after chloe. So once again, if you are thinking of braving it out and migrating – better think about it again. So, we depend on ourselves and a lot of people out there are the same way like us. So when your child is ill – moreso, you have to keep yourself healthy – afterall, we already sleep so little hours. Some of you might think that we can always go to bed early – but when you have a child that doesn’t sleep and leave you much time to do other things – you just have to give up on some sleep.

So when chloe is this sick – which is normally isn’t – thank God! i try to eat well and rest well and try not to work too much in the store nor online – but i know it is not easy because we are still constantly worried about her. But one has to try and one has to make the spouse sleep when one has too like i do – for PB just have too much interest – but who doesn’t eh.

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Relationship With A Foreigner

So you think that you survive a long-distance relationship or even fall in love with a foreigner and live happily ever after? Before we even begin – let me tell you about the dark circles under eye, from the time difference we have here and Asia. And for those who are not aware of this – most of the “angmohs” i’ve met can be very quick to fall in love and also to fall outta love.

Why do i say that? well, we have a long time friend who just came back from Calgary – and he came out of a very bad relationship. When he first visited us – a few weeks ago – he swore never to see another “crazy” Canadian again – hahah!! apparently, the one he was with or left – was psychoville. But guess what today, he was in the store and happily introduced a woman to me – and called her the love of his life. *slap forehead* – well i can understand if the woman was a beauty or with legs or bums or whatever – but this one – *ahem* – no legs, no looks, no body, no hair, no nothing – if you know what i mean.

Plus he isn’t the first person doing this since I’ve been here for the last 10 yrs – relationships in this town can be as flimsy as your napkins these days it seems. It saddens me – to see people treat relationship this way. So if you are thinking of having relationship with a foreigner – well, i have only one advice – make sure you spend enough time long – distance with him to know that he is worth it.

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Meaning Of Mother’s Day

Many years ago, when I was celebrating Mother’s Day – my mother wanted a bouquet of roses from us and many years ago – we all know that in Singapore a bouquet of roses can come up to a good $60. Of course, $60 isn’t a lot now – when you are working and have the money – but some 25 yrs ago – I couldn’t afford it – but I still did it – because I wanted to make my mother proud. I wanted her to be proud and to be able to tell her friends what she got for Mother’s day.

Now that I’ve become a mother – I know I would never ask for perfumes, going out for dinner nor a bouquet of roses from my spouse nor my kid – why? because you do not measure love this way. Mother’s Day to me is a celebration of the kid who have given me a purpose in my life. Chloe has made me a better person – had she not come along – my life would have been meaningless right now.

While for my mother – it was a kind of safety net for her to have children when she is old – but for me – its about giving life and giving the life that i brought into this world the best. I don’t know what her future holds but i certainly do not want to burden chloe with looking after me when i am old – well – this has yet to cross my mind. All i want for her on Mother’s Day – is for her to grow up healthy and become a good person. The meaning of Mother’s Day to me – is not about me – it’s about doing the best I can for my kid on Mother’s Day.

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Migrate To Canada Pros & Cons

Canada is an awesome place – most people are nice – but like everywhere else – there are crooks, scammers, cheaters – well, you get the idea. Like I tell everyone back home and friends from afar – had we not own our own business – Canada would be a wonderful place and this town wouldn’t be so harsh looking and scrutinized that badly by me.

So you heard that health care is free in Canada – yes ! you heard right but if you need prenatal vitamins or any kind of antibiotics – and sometimes – if your doctor had been given favors to recommend certain pharmaceutical medication – you will be paying an arm and a leg for them. And yes – Canada is scenic – but did anyone tell you about the weather here ? It’s May here – and it’s still chilly! Winter can be harsh too – but there are no tornadoes here or earthquakes.

Ok, ok! so you still wanna migrate to Canada – i hear yer! free school for children – yes ! but like all public system in any part of the world – free means – not enough teachers to go around and if you are in the city – there are private schools but that would mean you have to work 24/7 or be in a high paying job or filthy rich.

I get asked this often – is it hard to migrate to Canada? I don’t really think so – Canadian immigrations have a few plans for those considering their migration – as for me – i came as a visitor and then became a permanent resident with my spouse sponsoring me – and of course – don’t forget you have to pay to apply to migrate here and take all your medicals here – like x-rays- blood test and an immigration doctor has to see you . Thereafter, you can apply for citizenship after 5 yrs. I’ve heard horror stories about immigration before – but in my experience with the Canadian immigration – they were nothing but nice to me – always helpful and insightful. If you heard stories of given a hard time – that must mean that there were problems with the application – I doubt Canadian immigration is out to get the colored people or biased in any way. I’ve always been treated with respect – be it a phone call or letter writing – so there you have it.

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Me & My Bike

Hunting for the ride bike has been my mission for a long, long time. I use the excuse of not getting the right bike to NOT exercise with PB – when he goes on his bike rides in the summer – how convenient eh. So while i wanted to stay home and do my apidexin reviews, he insisted that we go look for a bike at the local store in town. But of course, this time i didn’t have any excuse no more because – they did have a cruiser in store. Lovely bike isn`t it – it will sure motivate me to bike in my new lovely bike – hahah!! PB said no more excuses now – i hope with this bike – i will get in shape this time – wish me luck eh..!! hahaha!! i`m lazy – i know!!